if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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