Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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