Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize