He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
