Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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