But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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