it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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