I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
