I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
