Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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