I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
