Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize