I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you would pick up someone in the library
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
