About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
