she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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