I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
