when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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