My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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