He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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