If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
