i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize