Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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