the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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