Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
