Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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