The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
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