I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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