This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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