Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
high people should be assigned attendants
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
