he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
How does it feel to date your dad?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
