I think I just saw someone hide a body.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
