hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
