Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
