i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
