if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
