When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Randomize
