omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
