He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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