don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
