A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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