I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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