that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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