Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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