Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
