Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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