let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
