Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Randomize
