why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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