So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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