your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
